Shawn asks: “I’ve started college and there’s a girl on my dorm floor that I really like. We don’t have any classes together, but we talk all the time in the common area. It’s at the point where I go to study in there just to see her, and then we end up talking for hours. The last time I saw her, she went on and on about some guy she had a crush on, but then found out he wasn’t old enough to drink so she wanted to move on. Am I in the friend zone, or is there some way I can ask her out?”
Bonny’s answer: There’s an easy way to find out if she’s open to dating you, and that’s by asking her point blank if she’d like to go on a date. The next time you see her, try something like, “I had a great time talking the other night. How about we do it again on Thursday, but this time over dinner?”
It’s simple, easy, and lets her say no if she’s not interested, doesn’t want to date someone who lives so close to her, or is still really interested in that other guy and just wanted your opinion on the matter. If she says no, you can assume it has nothing to do with you, and it saves you both from feeling embarrassed when you inevitably run into one another again. If she says yes, you know she’s interested – at least a little bit. But if you don’t ask at all? You’ll never know, and you’ll slide deeper and deeper into friends-only territory, with no hopes of ever getting past conversation starters alone.
There’s a Pick Up Artist (PUA) “rule” that you have to talk to a woman you’re interested in within a few seconds of seeing her. The longer you wait, the more difficult the introduction gets and the less chance you have of getting the girl. Now, I’m not asking you to start studying to become a PUA, but I am suggesting you keep this one tactic in mind when talking to this girl again. The longer you wait, the harder the approach, and the less chance you’ll have of dating her.
What do you think, dear readers? Would you give Shawn different advice, or do you agree with what I’ve said?